“Happy” Memorial Day?
I saw that title on a few posts I found (using the technorati link Alex references below) in what I’d call a ‘flippy-do’ way. Alex uses it himself, although in a much more restrained way. And it crystallized for me just why I’m feeling so disconnected from the rest of the world this weekend.
Memorial Day is not a vehicle for wishing someone a “happy” day. Sure, to many people, it signifies nothing more than a 3-day weekend, the start of summer, and a bunch of sales at retail outlets galore. And for a long time, I felt that way too.
But two years ago today, I lost someone dear to me on Memorial Day weekend. He died in a land far far away from home. He joined the ranks of thousands of other soldiers who died in the service of their country.
Sure, I may raise a glass in memory of Joe at a holiday barbecue later this evening. And I may laugh, tell a joke or two, and enjoy myself. But forgive me if I fail to wish you a ‘Happy Memorial Day.’ For the families and friends left grieving the ones they loved and lost, it will never be a holiday that one looks forward to celebrating. And there’s nothing ‘happy’ about it.
Thanks for pointing this out. Here in the land of Dixie, the (public) college where I teach does not “celebrate” the national Memorial Day. The college takes “Confederate Memorial Day” (May 10th) and “(Union, I guess) Memorial Day” (May 29th) as holidays in the last week of December. So, we have to teach (and students have to learn) on Memorial Day. As a minor protest, I have taken to writing the names and home towns of all the Iraq war dead from our state on the board, and leaving it there during the class. It’s a travesty not to have the day off, especially for a public institution.
Yes, I was confused about how to end the post, especially with what we are looking at through our day’s events and our history in sending young men and women to war, wrapping their mission in nationalistic fervor.
I think more so, now, I’d say happy memories to all the families who have been affected by war. For with happiness, does come sadness. And this is a sad day for us all. And so on this sad day, I wish families happy memories of the ones they loved so much. Happy memories that remind them of the people, the individuals, whose complexities, passions and humanity make us all think of who we are and what we mean to each other in this world that sometimes seems to be unraveling so close to home and far, far away.