So, my band is planning a short weekend jaunt into Californialand. All of us are over 30, married or with significant others, and in various stages of employment. We’re old, settled, and don’t do anything more than drink a few beers at the show. Zeppelin we are not. So, for us, this is a “tour”. Two days out is fun. Five days out is fun, but more than that is not. Sharing the same car space and hotel rooms and restaurant booths with the same people for days at a time breeds a strange kind of contempt, no matter how close you are to them personally. At least, it does at my age.
That’s not to say that we don’t have our share of stories from the road. For instance, we played a show in San Francisco a couple of years back. The show went off without a hitch. The venue was full, we didn’t suck, and the crowd was great. As icing on the cake, punk-rock legend Jello Biafra was in attendance, and we all got to spend a goodly amount of time shooting the breeze with one of our idols (he’s nicer and much less caustic than you would imagine him to be). Cloud nine. At the club, we met a guy who talked us into playing his “underground club” in San Jose the next evening. Sounded like a good idea when you’re still running on adrenaline, but the next day, it didn’t sound too fun. After some serious soul-searching, we opted to play the show instead of just monkeying around SF.
We drove the hour to San Jose. The “venue” was a shed in this guy’s backyard that was filled to the brim with tweakers, addicts, and the most unfriendly kids in the Bay Area. During one of the opener’s sets, a kid fell down in the pit. Punk-rock decorum dictates that you help up people who have fallen down. Not this crowd. The kid got kicked in the head, a brawl ensued, and “security” (the guy who owned the house and his brother) threw the miscreants out. Our set was a nightmare. There was no stage, which meant that we were playing in the pit. “Security” tried to help us, but they were only two people. I got a gnarly cut underneath my fingernails when somebody was thrown into me, hitting my hand and causing the guitar strings to go up under my nails, bamboo-style. Our bass player was pinned against the wall for the entire set by a sweaty 250+ pound girl (that was actually pretty funny). Our drummer nearly got into a fight with a couple of people whom he suspected were planning on stealing some of our gear. Our pay for the night? Eight bucks and a disposable lighter.
I know that a lot of musicians both present and former read MetBlogs. So, what are your best road stories?